RELATIONSHIP COACHING

increase intimacy, connection & affection

Shift conflict & confrontation back to communication & conversation

CREATE and maintain A passionate LOVE THAT LASTS

You deserve a satisfying, passionate, committed relationship full of trust, security, intimacy and affection.

But you can’t seem to figure out how to get there, or how to keep the spark alive.

You know your relationship needs to be the priority, but it’s fallen to the back burner.

Your work is stressful, your friends and family demand your time, you have other obligations that pull you away from your partner, or maybe you’ve given someone else attention outside of your relationship.

Your sex life is suffering.

Communication and conversation has turned into confrontation and conflict.

You’ve been neglecting your partner, or unwilling until this point to put in the effort to turn things around.

Yet you know your relationship is what’s most important, and ultimately can bring you the most joy in life.

They say on your deathbed you’re not wishing you sold one more deal or earned another promotion.

Rather, you’re regretful of all of the missed opportunities to connect with the person you love most, or are deeply sorry for hurting your partner.

At the end of your life, you don’t want to look back and wonder if you could have been happier in your relationship, put in more effort and energy, or experienced a deeper love.

You’re sick of feeling frustrated, confused, and hurt.

You’re unsure of how to get yourself and your partner out of this rut, but you know you want and need more out of this relationship.

Do any of these sound familiar?

• You’re constantly arguing and wondering why everything turns into a blow out fight
• Your sex life is no longer as hot and passionate as it once was, or maybe it’s non-existent
• You had an affair and are unsure how to work through it
• Your partner cheated and you’re contemplating leaving or staying together
• You’ve been growing apart; there’s a distance that did not exist before
• You feel disconnected and detached from your partner
• When you approach your partner about an issue, he or she shuts down or refuses to problem solve together
• You're lonely, unheard, and unsupported in your relationship
• You have difficulty agreeing on life goals, such as kids, money management, or a work/life balance
• You struggle to talk about your sexual preferences and desires
• You have a lot of unmet needs (physical and emotional)
• You’ve brought baggage from past relationships into your current one
• You don’t trust your partner and are unsure how to forgive any hurts
• You don’t feel like a priority
• You constantly feel like you’re taking one step forward and two steps back in your relationship
• You’re considering a breakup or divorce

Every day I help couples work through these issues to create greater relationship satisfaction. 

You can wish and hope all you want that your partner will change, or your relationship will be better, but nothing will improve unless you take action. 

Happy relationships bring us the most joy in the world, yet you've never formally learned how to have a successful one.

You hire accountants to manage your money, and personal trainers to get you in shape, so it's natural that you'd turn to a love expert to get you the results you desire.

I’m a trained expert:

You’ve likely done your research, but I’m Samantha Burns, and I can help you uncover the secret ingredients to cook up a happy love life full of intimacy, connection and satisfaction.

Unlike many love gurus and coaches, as a Relationship Counselor and Dating Consultant, I am licensed and have a Master’s degree (and B.A) in Counseling Psychology with a concentration in couples therapy.

I’ve combined my clinical skills with a coaching approach that allows me to be more hands-on, directive, and advice giving for a fast paced, results driven process that will transform your love life.

My education and training enables me to bring my clients the best support, techniques, and evidence based practice to enable change.

I have nearly a decade of experience working with both individuals and couples to create love lives that thrive.

What also differentiates me from other coaches is that I believe in science and data, which supports our work together, rather than just my “expert opinion” from my own life experience.

But rest assured, my personal experiences in my marriage inspire me every day. That’s because I don’t just talk the talk, I walk the walk by practicing and implementing the same skills that I teach my clients.

I’m often sought out in the media for my sage wisdom and advice, working as an expert contributor for sites such as Huffington Post, Women’s Health, Brides, Your Tango, Bustle, Elite daily, Reader’s Digest, Refinery29, and have also been featured on the Today Show, Inside Edition, and Yahoo.

In your extraordinary relationship transformation, I’m going to show you exactly how to:

• How to communicate in a way that leads to feeling heard, understood and validated
• How to rebuild trust, safety, and security in your relationship
• How to stop pointing fingers and blaming each other so that you can work together to overcome conflict
• How to avoid common pitfalls and dysfunctional dynamics
• How to make decisions as a team
• How to feel more connected and have more FUN together
• How your childhood attachments impact your adult romantic relationships and understanding your attachment style so it does not negatively impact your relationship
• How to increase intimacy and improve your sex life
• How to feel more comfortable being vulnerable and open with your partner
• How to identify and speak each other’s love language(s)
• How to evaluate whether you should stay together or end the relationship

All of our work is tailored to your individual needs given your presenting issues.

After working together during this life-changing coaching experience, you will feel:

***More trusting, safe and secure in your relationship***

***Emotionally and physically intimate with your partner on a deeper level than you ever thought possible***

***A more soulful connection with your partner***

***Lighthearted, flirtatious and passionate, like the way things used to be when you first started dating***

***More carefree and less stressed and irritable***

***As though you can tackle any problem or conflict together as a team***

***More joy and purpose in your life***

***A greater sense of belonging because your partner makes you feel loved, cared for, and that you truly matter***

***As an individual you’ll feel more energetic, and alive. That’s because research shows couples in stable, happy long-term relationships are more creative, explorative, and productive. They also live longer, enjoy a more satisfying sex life, experience less stress, live a healthier lifestyle and have lower rates of heart disease, diabetes and depression***

You deserve to feel all of these things.

Why go one more day arguing about sex, feeling alone despite living with your partner, and wondering if you'll always be unhappy in this relationship? It's time to get back to the joy, fulfillment, and satisfaction that you once felt.

Or at the very least, end the relationship with greater understanding of your behaviors and emotions, so you can leave with peace of mind that you've given it your all.

Want a glimpse into what’s possible for you? Check out these TESTIMONIALS from my clients who took action to create a fulfilling and rewarding love life:  

Sarah & Charley:

We had been looking for a new couples therapist who was open minded and would "get us." For over a year we struggled with feeling disconnected, and our intimacy was suffering as a result. We had a shared vision of the things we wanted in life, but it felt like we couldn't get out of our own way and we were increasingly unhappy. The buildup of daily life stress and big life events (death in the family, losing a job, planning a wedding, buying a house) had taken their toll. It was clear that we were reinforcing negative patterns of communication along the way and we couldn't see eye to eye on how to improve the way that our relationship felt. This caused an erosion of trust and we just felt unhappy with one another. 

Working with Samantha has drastically improved our communication by focusing on empathy. Now, when we have conflict, we stop and ask ourselves "what is *really* bothering them? how can I be most helpful right now? Is it possible that I'm making this worse?". Samantha encouraged us to start a daily gratitude practice, so now before bed we say one thing that we're grateful for.  It has become a nice moment in our day to reflect on and vocalize appreciation for each other. I think it has had a good snowball effect, we are kinder and more thoughtful because we want the gold star at "gratefulness time"! 

One of our favorite things about Samantha is how open minded she is, she often talks about new research she has read, or experts she seeks out and collaborates with. Her emphasis on understanding each other's "love languages" and more broadly - what we need from each other - has had a lasting impact on us. We love that Samantha feels like a peer - she understands the unique challenges that millennials face and she is authentic about her passion for helping couples be happier together! 

Karla & Matt:

We came to Samantha for pre-marital counseling and to work on our communication. While working with her we have been able to learn each others' love languages, and how to best express love in the way that our partner can receive it best. This has made us both feel more loved and appreciated. We have also been able to learn to better communicate with one another and have made some really good progress in making sure we each feel validated and understood. Samantha never made us feel judged or uncomfortable and she was really able to understand what areas we needed to work on and how best to help us. Working with Samantha has been wonderful and overall both of us are happier and have a healthier and stronger relationship. Even through all the stress of wedding planning, our relationship is getting stronger. We will definitely continue to work with Samantha! We can't thank her enough!!!

rachelle & jason:

We were having issues fighting frequently and locked in a dance where neither of us would give in. We have worked with Samantha over the past year and she has helped us to view each others’ point of view with empathy and to recognize our triggers for falling into bad behavior. Our fights have become less frequent and damaging and our communication has improved enormously. We are finally able to support each other through life’s events and to feel that we have a partner to lean on.

Claire & ethan:

Shortly after my husband and I got married, I very publically found out about an infidelity that had occurred years before. I wrestled with insecurity, anger and confusion as we were experiencing the highest of the highs post-nuptials, and the lowest of the lows. Not everyone knew, and those that found out with me were shellshocked about the truth of our “picture-perfect” relationship. Through counseling and utter honesty, Samantha has helped us not only restore our previously solid relationship, but brought us to new heights as a couple by uncovering issues with intimacy, communication and prioritizing one another in the midst of two very busy careers, along with helping us both understand how to deal with “the new normal.” Our relationship is an open book, and we both realize how closely we came to losing one another. I’m not sure how we would have - and continue - to get through one of the toughest things a relationship has to face without her counseling. I give her my highest recommendation for couples counseling. - 

Are you ready to cultivate the love that will make you proud, satisfied and content that you’ve lived and loved to your fullest potential?

If you’re still reading this, you’re likely wondering how this whole coaching process works.

You will fill out the application below.

We will have a FREE CLARITY CALL during which we will discuss your biggest relationship challenge, get clear on what you really want and your goals for coaching. 

I will determine if we are a good fit, and then discuss my services in more detail  (I will never take on a client that I don’t strongly believe I can help).

If we move forward together, we will talk via video or phone call for 45 – 60 minutes on a weekly or biweekly basis, and you will also receive email support outside of scheduled sessions, "homework" assignments, and additional resources.

I only take on a limited number of clients so that you can have support and access to me.

I offer multi-month coaching packages, rather than one-off sessions (which is kind of like a Bandaid) so that you have time to focus on long-term change.

I will hold you accountable and committed to your goals.

Your entire relationship transformation is what’s most valuable, which is why I am dedicated to seeing you get the results you most desire.

I only work with highly motivated people, who are aware that real long-lasting change takes time, and who are committed to the process.

Relationship Coaching is:

• Completely confidential
• Tailored to your individual needs
• The fastest, most effective way to create a love life that thrives

Here are a few things you’ll need to think through before starting a coaching program:

• You must be motivated to make changes, which means getting outside of your comfort zone and taking action.

• You must be open to receiving reflective and constructive feedback. Sometimes this means letting go of what you think you know and opening your mind to transformation.

• You must be willing to invest in yourself. This program is not cheap. If you don’t value this area of your life enough to invest in it, you’re either not committed to the process, or you don’t realize the value in it. It’s difficult to put a price tag on changing the entire dynamics of your relationship so that you can feel more connected, intimate and affection with your partner.  What would you give to no longer repeat the same arguments over and over again? To stop engaging in the same dysfunctional  dynamics that only waste your precious time, energy and love? To feel more trusting and secure in your relationship? To feel heard, validated and understood instead of your partner shutting down, becoming defensive, or yelling? What's it worth to you to create and maintain a passionate love that lasts for the rest of your life? 

Fill out an application:

Can't wait to connect with you!